Saturday, October 22, 2011

Relocating

My brother is coming home soon.
He’s been away visiting Dad.
We’re in the process of relocating,
and he’s been away preparing our new place.
When all is ready,
he’ll come back to pick us up.

He says it’s gorgeous.
That means a lot coming from my brother.
He’s seen a lot.
Good, bad, you name it.
You can count on what he says.

We’re here.
Eagerly waiting,
Preparing to leave.
I can only wonder what lies ahead…
It’ll be a new start.

He’s said be ready.
The move will be quicker than we think.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Praise Instead of Complain

Frustrating day.

Still learning, trying to practice praising my Lord for having brought me through...

Tonight I will thank him instead of bringing my troubles before him. I will tell him I love him rather than ask if he loves me. I will trust him instead of asking him 'why?'

I asked him that yesterday.

He smiled that smile that only loved children know. The tolerant smile that says, 'One day you'll understand.'

His answers don't anger me as much anymore. My patience has slowly grown. 

I'm a dad. I'd love to hear my children, on days that did not go their way, thank me that our home is still here. It would be incredible if they said 'I have no idea what you're doing Dad, but I know you're doing it for me.'

"I know it's been difficult. One day it will all make sense," I'd tell them.

"Today was the worst..."

"Tomorrow's another day, I promise I'll still love you."

There's a beautiful song that I must look up tomorrow. 'Because He Lives.'

Monday, October 3, 2011

Brothers (11 and 12 years old)

Psalm 133:1a, 3b: How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! ...for there the Lord bestows his blessing, even life forevermore.

“Am not!

“Are too!  Man, look at you. You mess everything--I mean everything--up!"


"No, I don't..."


Yeah, yeah you do... you're in the way! You’re a fudge-squashed screw-up!”

“No-o-o…”

“I’m warning you, if you mention to Mom anything--and I mean anything--about me kissing Cathy, and that’s it. I swear I’ll beat you everyday for as long as you live.”

“Yeah, right…”

“Oh, no? Don’t believe me? Don't believe me? How ‘bout I start on your face right now?”

“Go ‘head and try…”


“Ah-h-h what’s the use. You'll still be a screw-up. You’ll always be a screw-up. You have no idea what it means to be a man.”

“I’m only eleven...”

“Yeah, you’ll probably always be eleven. You know they mixed you up at the hospital, don’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You don’t even belong here in this family. The nurse mixed up you and this other kid. Gave mom the wrong one. Ended up giving me the wrong brother…”

“They can’t do that…”

“Oh no? Then how come you’re so weird? How come you’re so scared to do anything? You don’t even have a girl friend yet…”

“That’s not weird.”

“How come you won’t ever do anything for me?”

“I don’t like lying.”

“That’s what I mean. You won’t do anything for me when I ask. You don’t know how to love like a real brother.”

“Why do you ask me to do the wrong thing?

“The wrong thing? The wrong thing? How is keeping me from getting in trouble the wrong thing?”

“Mom said no girl friends ‘til we’re twenty-five.”

“So you want me to get punished?”

“She’s gonna ask me…”

“She’s not gonna ask--.”

“She always asks me…”

“That’s ‘cause you’re a little tattle-tale.”

“I don’t like lying is all.”

“Yeah, well, then I don’t like you. Sounds like you’re gonna get me in trouble again. Sounds like you’re gonna screw everything up for me again. Sounds like you don’t really love me. Sounds like you have no clue about being a man. Real men know when it’s important to lie.”

“I’m only eleven.  And I’m not the one who gets you in trouble.”

“Oh no? Really? Then who gets me in trouble?”

“Why can’t you just wait ‘til you’re twenty-five?”

“—Cause… ‘cause Cathy loves me. What am I supposed to do? It’s not my fault.”

“You’re only twelve—”

“I’m a man, okay. A real man! Don’t forget it. Maybe you’re not and maybe you have no chance of ever being one, but I’m a man and the only question is if Mom asks about Cathy, what are you going to say? Are you gonna tell? Are you? That's what I want to know. That’s the only thing that matters.”

“Why do I have to lie to make you think I love you?”